We’re not good enough of friends to exchange gifts.

I’m going to get you exactly what you got me last year.

I thought the divorce I granted you gave me a lifetime pass.

Thanks anyway but I only can carry one wallet at a time.

Slow down buddy we’re only facebook friends.

I didn’t send you a card this year what made you think you were getting a gift?

Aren’t we in a recession ?

It must have been lost in the mail with my credit card bill, I’ll have to get back to you with a tracking number.

I rather spend the $25 on internet porn.

Dude I didn’t think the snuggie was gonna cut it this year.