• “I don’t think they are going to be ready for this situation. Everyone’s gonna be like “oh shoot, that’s the situation right there” -Mike, “The Situation”

• “Wear a thong bikini if you are going to wear anything at all That’s a little bit more classy you know.”

• “Girls are supposed to cook and the guys are supposed to eat but Mikey did his thing we had like peppas”

• “Don’t make a joke outta grace.”

• “All the girls are like fish and so we throw out a line and see if we can sink it.”

• “The boys are in the hottub with these three hoebags.” -Angela “They were definitely cool chicks. You know some of the girls in the house didn’t even want to get in on Jacuzzi night.” -Vinny

• “When I think of the jersey shore, I think of a playground.”

• “I love the jersey shore. I love being a guidette but I’m not feeling it right now. I’m the princess of Poughkeepsie but here I’m nobody.” -Snookie
  

• “New Jersey nightlife is always crazy. People grinding on each other, people dogging each other. It’s a good time.”

• “My idea man would be Italian, dark, muscles, juicehead guido. If I found that guy, I’d snatch him like that. I wanna bring home guys, it’s hard. Like it shouldn’t be hard but it is hard because it’s like a chore you know.” –Snookie.

• “Me and my friend robbie wanted to watch the sunset. No the sunrise.” -Snookie

• “You know what time it is? It’s time to get my rhino juice in my SYSSSTem The Rhino juice get the night going. I mean when ever that comes up it’s always a filthy night. It really is. That’s the root of all evil.” -Ronnie

• “I wait til the last minute to go shave. I wait til the last minute to put the shirt on cause it feels fresh. These are rules to live by. Shave last minute haircut the day of maybe some tanning and the gym. You gotta get the guido handbook.”

• “I hear the music. I start fist pumpin I start pulling girls up on stage and it’s like now…vinny came out to play.”

• “A guidette is somebody who knows how to club it up, takes really good care of themselves, has pretty hair, cakes on makeup, has tan skin, wears the highest heels, pretty much they know how to own it and rock it.” -Sammi

• “Lose 5 /ten pounds and we can talk.” -Mike to Angela “Yo I will cut your hair while you are sleeping ok?” -Angela to Mike

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